Lol, you mean a perm? And a perm is perm-anet (permanet) but when your new growth comes in, it gives the appearance that the perm goes away (or fades) So the only way the perm truly goes away is if you damage your hair or something. And there are such things called "boxed perms" so you can do it at home. The only problem with that is...you're new to this..Like Beyonce said: Like a perm that's been left too long, it's like a burn, the result is it just won't tale! (B' Day : Green Light) So I suggest you do professional work and if that's too much you had better read every inch of the instructions!